I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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