I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
