He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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