Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
