did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
no you cant smoke seaweed
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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