whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
