My brain says no but my pants say off.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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