I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
They took my balls.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
