Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize