How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
