I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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