Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Randomize
