apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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