I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize