she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
vagina is talking i cant
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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