btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
