Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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