Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
