you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize