Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
