Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
