Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
