can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
