I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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