Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
