And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Ketchup is God's man juice
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
