Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Randomize
