dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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