doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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