its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
