Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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