I am in a vortex of obligation.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
