Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
