you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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