yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
