I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
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