Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
