this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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