You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
