I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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