Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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