We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
