Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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