you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
