I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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