honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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