You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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