Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
