so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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