I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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